Office Doodles

by The Weary Band

supported by


A home-made concept album about 9-5 office work.

Recorded from October 2009 - October 2010 by the band live onto 8-track tape and then transferred to ProTools where it was mixed by Tim and Phil and finally mastered by a friend in February 2011.

We hope someday, if we make enough money from downloads, to release the album on vinyl.


released March 16, 2011

Tim Calleja - Songwriter, vocals, guitar, keys.
Phil Collings - Drums, piano, organ, vocals, saw, percussion.
Alex Blain - Lead guitar, vocals.
Andrew Smith - Bass.
Beth Porter - Cello, vocals.



all rights reserved


The Weary Band Bristol, UK

We are a group of friends who write, record and produce our own songs using an old reel to reel tape machine. Our five home- made albums are available here and in all the usual digital stores. 'You can get lost' is also available on vinyl; contact us if you would like to buy a copy. ... more

contact / help

Contact The Weary Band

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: Welcome to the Team
Welcome to the team,
we'll be working closely on this project,
mainly you and me
so get used to my company
and feel free
to pick me up on any points
when you do not agree,
i may change my policy
just always be on time.

Even those days when you hate it all,
keep one good eye on that clock on the wall.

Welcome to the team,
there was something in that kiss you gave me.
More than Walls icecream,
more than just some passing fancy.
Heal my heart,
organise it from the start
so it will not be late,
so it will never hesitate
or fall apart like this.

Keep one good eye on my diary.
Pencil a window or two in for me
and you...(me and you).

Welcome to the team.
Now that you've passed your induction
I can really see just what you bring to the table.
Taking part,
Taking heart.
You're not just stationery.
The more you look the more you see
We are your family.
Track Name: Stationery Girl
I would file your claim if i knew what one was.
One is tired one is lame one is easily pissed-off.

Stationery girl keep your hand in mine.
If we make it through today then we might find.

Another life outside
Where no-one needs to hide
And people find a reason to confide.

Straight out of school, now in some lonely pool
Swimming with the sharks was never meant to be so cruel.

Praying for a change when September is strange.
You must realize what's on your mind.

Another life outside
Where no-one needs to hide
And people find a reason to confide.

Another life outside
Where no-one needs to hide
And people find a reason to confide.

La la laaaaaa...
Track Name: Christmas Mourning
Trust yourself.
Feed Your file.
Give your wealth a healthy smile.

Guard your egg,
it's worth your while.
Never beg or do in style.

I hope that you
come back to
show me what
I can do.

We're older now
Old and blue.
How many wishes of yours came true?

Go to sleep
early wake.
Winter mornings
make you shake.

Walk to work,
Faces grey.
All the same,

I hope that you
come back to
show me what
i can do.

We're older now,
old and blue.
How many wishes of yours came true?

You knew me from the start.
Saw through my like my friend.
You'll take this shame to heart.
But i'll take the blame again.
I'll take the blame.

Go to sleep.
Early wake.
Christmas mourning makes me shake.
Track Name: Salesman Keith
Salesman Keith he finds no belief
in keeping his dreams alive.
Physically ugly, exceptionally lonely,
always too drunk to drive.

Expresses belief in a greasy-haired chief
that gives-out a quota a day.
Salesman Keith doesn't like what he sees
he receeds from disease and decay.

He once made her smile
that girl he used to know,
why she was so

Writing reports about why we buy shorts
whilst scanning the stars in the sun.
Nobody cares what you do with their shares
just as long as you tell them they've won.

If it's all up to you why not do what I do,
i seem to dream a lot.
If i lied through my teeth like Salesman Keith
i wouldn't be sleeping at all.

He once made her smile,
that girl he used to know.
Why she was so

And you made her smile,
now all those years ago
when you were all so

Track Name: It's an Evil, Evil World
It's an evil, evil world don't tell your children lies
or they will look at you with evil in their eyes.
Should they realise that this life is tough
they'll surprise you soon enough.

It's an evil, evil world we work for those we hate
and evil boys and girls get paid an evil rate
'til they're old and grey and their eyes go blind
and their minds lag way behind.

People aren't as real as they ought to be.
Hesitate to realise the more you see,
the more you see,
the more you see,
you hate.

It's an evil, evil world, so evil i don't see
a way to make it work, the way it ought to be
It's one travesty after another,
all to much for me and her.
Track Name: Office Doodles
Keep all your empty cans and your rubber bands
in a rubber band ball that gets bigger by the day.
Soon it's as big as you and it's full of glue
you try to move but it unravels in your way.

The day may never end
and when will this morning ever end?
And nobody knows that you've been here
a million years or more my poor old friend.

Don't be a stranger here, be an engineer
be a closet queer you just seem curious to me.
Gizmos and gadget cars in bulimic bars
where the ra-ra's go to regurgitate their gear.

The day may never end
and when will this morning ever end?
And nobody told us that we would be here
until the fear made us depend.

Ebay is failing fast, all the geeks came last
but not on this electric super-market sweep.
Hair-nets and hand-me-downs on indignant clowns
with furrowed-frowns who make a date that you don't keep.

The day may never come
and you're sure the day won't ever come
when you see before you everyone
you fought with in the war you thought you'd won.

Gawd bless the Rolling Stones for their brittle tones
are keeping me from going mental at my desk.
Break-out the heroin and we'll break you in
I never thought it would break any of my freinds.

The day may never end
and when will this morning ever end?
Must be the day when we pretend
we spent the life we all wanted to spend.

Doldrums and office doodles, super-noodles,
food will screw you if you give it half a yard.
Life is a canope it's small and grey
it's what you pay is what you get is what is hard.
Track Name: Sweet Jesus
This car will see me through
see me through another year.
This job will have to do
have to do while you are hardly here.

The radiator hums
monday morning traffic tones.
The same tune every day
telling me that everything's ok

for now
for a while
show me how
Sweet Jesus style.
Sweet Jesus.
Sweet Jesus.

Your sugar-coated pill
far too sickly-sweet to swallow
still, i feel unwell
well, it's hard enough these days to tell.

This is my hell for now
for a while
lead me out
sweet Jesus style.
Sweet Jesus.
Sweet Jesus.

This job will see me through
see me through another year.
This car will have to do
have to do while you are hardly here.
Track Name: This is Business
Breakfast time Shreddies in a line
Columbo's in trouble with a peculiar crime.
The mayor is waiting in his car outside
hesitating 'coz he knows i'm right.

We don't have to answer to you,
we've known each other since 1952.

But this is business, this is crime
Tell your boss she won't be so lucky next time.
This is business, this is crime
Tell your mother what you do in your spare time.

Come over later and we'll have our fun.
Buckheimer's bitches at one in the sun.
The party's over before it's barely begun.
Gotta get the message through to everyone.

We're not here to have a good time,
we've hated each other's guts since 1969.


Lover's highway, a quarter to two
bring the whiskey and the super-glue.

Track Name: Tropical Diseases
Everybody's walking to the station.
Their faces look so downcast and so sad.
This is all, this is all on your terms.
This is all, this is all we have.

And then you throw-in Tropical Diseases,
and heartache that will never go away.
And children who walk around unwanted,
and dead-beats who will die before their day.

Why so mad am i?
Don't make me laugh I might cry.
Why so mad am i?
Mad am i?

But this is not an ordinary morning.
Today i found-out things about myself.
I'm not full of courage only worry.
Worry for the future of my health.

Why so mad am i?
Don't make me laugh i might cry.
Why so mad am i?
Mad am i?

When every single day is such an effort
and every single night is so serene.
You realise that sleep is all that you want.
You fantasize that death is but a dream.
Track Name: Spooner
Goes into an interview
doesn't know quite what to do,
fiddles with the spoon and soon
his future's looking grim, i think i'll call him Tim.

Instead he climbs and finds a park
sits with strangers in the dark
when they know that he's no NARC
they offer up a smoke but he's holding out for coke.

Whatever will you do?
Sees life in a spoon.

Sheltered from a nasty shower
where will he be in an hour?
I don't know but i've de-flowered
every girl in here, you push me and i steer.

I'd like to see you soon
And share life in your spoon.

There were days when his eyes were on fire.
There are ways to make him feel so much better.
There are lays that will come back to haunt yu.
There are names that will never forget you.

Track Name: The Office is a Place
You don't know anything about
the person i am not in here,
the office is a place where people disappear.
And every morning I arrive
i cannot look you in the eye,
i am not quite alive, i've come in here to die.
Keeping that and everything in mind...why?

I do the things you want me to
i make the coffee for the boss,
the office is a place where good people get lost.
And all the faces that i see
in and around me every day
they don't act normally, they act a funny way.
And i have to be careful what i say...why?

A devil's lurking in my desk
he wants to fuck away the day,
the office is a place where good minds go astray.
When i was young i was alive
i never thought i'd die like this,
the office is a place where people don't exist...

Track Name: I'm Green Aswell
Too much to think about
My head is always sore
and this ulcer keeps me up at nights
I can't do it anymore.

This job just makes me ill
The screen is flashing green
and I work and work
until i'm green aswell.

I'm Green Aswell.